Behaviour to Ignore

All of our little people, at one time during their lives will display annoying little behaviours. It could be anything such as hair twiddling, nose picking, nail biting, blinking, shoulder shrugging, face pulling, sniffing, the list is endless. Everyone who has anything to do with your child will start to notice it and talk about it or tell your child to stop doing it. On average it will take 66 days for this mildly irritating behaviour to turn into an infuriating habit. 

Why and how do these behaviours even start in the first place? They may have had a cold and started sniffing, it is commented on so they keep sniffing. They may have had a sticky out finger nail that they kept biting at, it was commented on so they didn't stop. There are four stages to habit forming, the first is 'the cue', this could be boredom, so they start fiddling with their hair, the second stage is 'the craving', it actually feels quite nice to twiddle with hair when bored, the third stage is 'the response', that's where everyone around your child starts saying things like "leave your hair alone, stop fiddling, your hair will fall out" and the fourth stage is 'the reward' - 'wow!' thinks the child, 'who would have guessed that by fiddling with my hair I would get so much attention? I will keep doing this.'

How can you stop this ever happening or break the habit if it is in full flow? The answer is simple, stop talking about it and ask every one around your child to stop talking about it. Keep their hands busy, habits are usually driven by boredom or sensory needs. If you see your child about to pick their nose, take them by the hand and offer activities that use the hands, distract them from the nose picking, but NEVER talk about or name the habit that you want them to stop. Start noticing the good choices that your child makes and praise them for it. Finally, give your child a sensory toy to fiddle with, a squidgy stretchy toy is so much more satisfying than putting your finger up your nose. The good news is that you can break a habit a lot quicker than you can make a habit but it is definitely a team effort.

Our thought for the week is:

It is easier to prevent bad habits than to break them.

If you have a parenting concern, you can contact Mrs Easty via the school office - admin@burlingtoni.org.uk